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Gupshup Forums :: Jokes :: LITTLE JOHNY!

wonderdude

posts:28

One day Lil Johny says to his father:

I want to get married.

Father: Oh, so do you have someone special in your mind?
Johny: Yes , Grandma
Father: What? There is a problem now, you want to marry my Mother?
Johny: Why not? You married my mother

On: Sep 25, 2007 08:23 pm

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wonderdude

posts:28

Re: LITTLE JOHNY!

On: Sep 25, 2007 08:35 pm

Score: 0

BERLIN WALL
In the class room, the teacher asks. "Who destroyed Berlin's wall?"

No one of her student can answer this question. They all keep silent. Then the teacher turns her face to Little Johnny. "Johnny ?"

"No, I didn't !!!!" exclaimed Little Johnny.

"How rude you are to answer me like that !" The teacher then writes a letter to Little Johnny's father and asks him to come to her office to discuss his son's behavior.

The next morning, Little Johnny's father comes and meets the teacher in her office. The teacher tells the story to Johnny's father but to your surprise, Johnny's father responds like this : "Well, if he was the one, he would honestly tell so!"

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wonderdude

posts:28

Re: LITTLE JOHNY!

On: Sep 25, 2007 08:33 pm

Score: 0

Little Johnny asks an expecting woman: "What is in your tummy ?"

"My baby!"

"Do you love him!"

"You betcha!"

"Why did you eat him then?"

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wonderdude

posts:28

ACTING

On: Sep 25, 2007 08:31 pm

Score: 0

Little Johnny's dad picked him up from school to take him to a dental appointment. Knowing the parts for the school play were supposed to be posted today, he asked his son if he got a part.

Little Johnny enthusiastically announced that he'd gotten a part. "I play a man who's been married for twenty years."

"That's great, son. Keep up the good work and before you know it they'll be giving you a speaking part."

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wonderdude

posts:28

Re: LITTLE JOHNY!

On: Sep 25, 2007 08:30 pm

Score: 0

> Little Johnny's kindergarten class was on a field trip to their local police station where they saw pictures, tacked to a bulletin board, of the 10 most wanted criminals. One of the youngsters pointed to a picture and asked if it really was the photo of a wanted person. "Yes," said the policeman. "The detectives want very badly to capture him." Little Johnny asked, "Why didn't you keep him when you took his picture?"

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wonderdude

posts:28

Re: LITTLE JOHNY!

On: Sep 25, 2007 08:29 pm

Score: 0

Little Johnny returns from school and says he got an F in arithmetic.
"Why?" asks the father.
"The teacher asked 'How much is 2 x 3?' I said 6.
"But that's right!"
"Then she asked me 'How much is 3 x 2?'
"What's the fuXXing difference?" asks the father.
"That's what I said!"

*****************************

A new teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses. She started her class by saying, "Everyone who thinks you're stupid, stand up!" After a few seconds, Little Johnny stood up. The teacher said, "Do you think you're stupid, Little Johnny? "No, ma'am, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself!"

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wonderdude

posts:28

Re: LITTLE JOHNY!

On: Sep 25, 2007 08:28 pm

Score: 0

At Sunday School they were teaching how God created everything, including human beings. Little Johnny seemed especially interested when they told him how Eve was created out of one of Adam's ribs.
Later in the week his mother noticed him lying down as though he were ill, and said, "Johnny what is the matter?"
Little Johnny responded, "I have a pain in my side. I think I'm going to have a wife."

**********************************************

Little Johnny returns from school and says he got an F in arithmetic.
"Why?" asks the father.
"The teacher asked 'How much is 2 x 3?' I said 6.
"But that's right!"
"Then she asked me 'How much is 3 x 2?'
"What's the fuXXing difference?" asks the father.
"That's what I said!"

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wonderdude

posts:28

Re: LITTLE JOHNY!

On: Sep 25, 2007 08:27 pm

Score: 0

Little Johnny was sitting on a park bench munching on one candy bar after another. After the sixth one a man on the bench across from him said, "Son, you know eating all that candy isn't good for you. It will give you acne, rot your teeth, make you fat."
Little Johnny replied, "My grandfather lived to be 107 years old."
The man asked, "Did your grandfather eat 6 candy bars at a time?"
Little Johnny answered, "No, he minded his own business!"

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wonderdude

posts:28

Re: LITTLE JOHNY!

On: Sep 25, 2007 08:26 pm

Score: 0

Little Johnny's father said, "let me see your report card."
Johnny replied, "I don't have it."
"Why not?" His father asked.
"My friend just borrowed it. He wants to scare his parents."
************************************************************

Little Johnny came running into the house and asked, "Mommy, can little girls have babies?"
"No," said his mom, "of course not."
Little Johnny then ran back outside and his mom heard him yell to his friends, "It's okay, we can play that game again!"

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wonderdude

posts:28

LITTLE JOHNY!

On: Sep 25, 2007 08:24 pm

Score: 0

Teacher What a pair of strange socks you are
wearing, one is
green
nd one is blue with red spots!
L-Johnny Yes it's really strange. I've got another
pair of the
same at home.

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-
Teacher Now, children, if I saw a man beating a
donkey and
stopped
him, what virtue would I be showing?
L-Johnny Brotherly love.

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-
Teacher Now, Johny, tell me frankly do you say
prayers before
eating?
L-Johnny No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a
good cook. my mother

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